Ever accomplished something you were proud of, such as getting a better job, or finally owning the home you were looking for, only to notice that your friends or family members aren’t quite happy for you? It happens to everyone.
Yet it has nothing to do with you particularly.
Why does it happen? Why can’t they be happy if you become more successful, after all, you didn’t do anything to them? Part of it is jealousy. Many friends are secretly competing with all their acquaintances. As long as they are the center of attention, everything is fine. But don’t you dare take the spotlight away from them, then their real colors are exposed!
Another reason for such behavior is the fact that other people’s success reminds them of the lack of such success in their own life. It can be a depressing feeling when others around you are moving ahead, yet you are standing still. This should be taken as fuel to motivate yourself to get out there and make things happen, but most simply take it the wrong way and just can’t swallow it. Thus why you see these same people avoid talking about your new found success, or completely avoiding you altogether.
You will notice that the people that are truly happy for you aren’t necessarily your closest allies. It will usually be people that have had success themselves and are not threatened whatsoever by the fact that someone else they know has success. You see, most people can digest that other people are more successful than they are, as long as it is far away. When it’s too close to home, they can’t stomach it.
Many friendships have soured because of these types of events. It’s quite unfortunate, since we all should be happy for everyone else’s success. It’s not like there are limited spots to fight for to be successful. It’s like love, there is no limit to love in the world, we’ll never run out of love. Same with success. Everyone has the opportunity to be successful without stepping on each other’s toes, especially family & friends.
Remember that our world is full of energies. We tend to get what we put out. Be genuinely happy for others. Other people succeeding is also your success because on this planet, we are all One. Project happiness outwardly, and soon enough, you will see that happiness & success finds it way much more easily towards you 😉
@ Sam, I completely agree with you. I had a toxic friend who is exactly the same as you describe in your post. All through my engagement and even buying our first home, all she had were snarky, resentful comments. During her engagement it was all about her all the time…and my happiness during her time was genuine. I kept my distance from her…now we don’t speak often but not being around her negativity has been great. negative people will bring you down if you let them. Surrounding myself with positive and truly genuine friends is key 🙂
I’ve had many successes in life, as of late. However, my “friends” with whom I’ve always supported by going above and beyond, have really shown me how selfish they are. Disregarding, not even acknowledging, my successes hurt. Especially when they celebrate and promote the tiniest achievements (as long as it’s not mine).
I agree with this totally. I know someone that I feel this way about. Honestly for me, the friendship is over. She started her own photography business with a camera daddy bought her and I’m sorry I can be that lucky. She also makes more than me and works half the hours… she is home at noon taking naps. Plus, she is a total snob and very opinionated and unsympathetic. She is moving soon, so I shouldn’t have to deal with much longer.