Going through a break up after a long relationship is one of the hardest things to experience in life. However, how you deal with its aftermath can determine how well you will handle your “new environment”.
Many people fail to grasp the opportunity available after a break up: the opportunity to re-discovering yourself. You see, for so long, you were thinking for two, and everything you did was not just for you but for someone else. Now, all of a sudden, you are back to being YOU again…you and only you that is! Many people fear this moment and jump right back into another relationship. They are trying to fill the void with someone else. And this is why, usually, these relationships never last.
It is important to spend time with yourself alone after a break up. I have always said and believed, that you cannot be well in a relationship, if you are not truly well all alone. In other words, only once you are happy alone, can you be truly happy with someone else. A relationship is not a solution to a problem, a relationship is a reward to solving a problem! Most people have this backwards, and hence all the relationship problems encountered.
People that jump from one relationship to another fail to live quite a rewarding experience. After a break up, it is the perfect opportunity for you to reassess your stance in life. Figure out what path you are going to take, deciding what to do with yourself, etc. It is the right time for you to actually be selfish! Think about only yourself and do all the things that you have been wanting to do.
In a relationship, you are offering yourself to someone else. If you can’t handle yourself, how do you expect someone else to handle you? This aftermath of a break up is the time for you to remember who you really are and improve, evolve, into an even better person, with all the lessons that this relationship, even if it didn’t work, provided you with. Only once you feel this enormous peace within yourself, that you are content and happy being alone, that you are then ready to invite someone new into your life and share that peace and happiness with them 🙂